I haven't been to Jazzercise as much lately. Not because I don't like it anymore, but because I've been so emotionally distraught, and it has progressively gotten worse over the past few months. At first I thought I was turning into a psycho, delusional bitch, but then my psychotic episodes only seemed to fall on the third week before my period every month. I had built up rage. It simmered within me, and the slightest things would set me off. I would go from completely fine to screaming at the top of my lungs, to crying hysterically and locking myself in my bedroom all day.
It's been like that since about September of last year. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me, but my husband could pinpoint the time frame which I was expected to reach my boiling point and explode, and then I'd feel fine throughout the rest of the month. It took me until last month when I was fumbling through my bag and grasped the cause of my new found vindictive personality in my hand. The beige compact case. I opened it up and looked at it, and for a split second I wondered, could it be my birth control pills conjuring up my monthly rage and causing me to go ballistic?
At first I thought it was nonsense. But then the more I thought about it, the more things started to add up. These little tablets have different levels of hormones. The third week of pills have the highest levels of hormones, which would most likely explain my severe moodiness.
Just to be sure, I went back to the doctor and he ended up prescribing me a different birth control pill called Yaz. It has lower doses of hormones that will help treat symptoms of PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder) which is a severe form of PMS.
So here I am, once again. I just finished up my last week of crazy pills (I've been taking Ortho Tri-Cyclen Lo for the past year) and am about to start this new birth control pack. I'm really nervous about it after reading all the reviews and a lot of them seemed to be negative with SCARY side effects, but I have to at least try it. It may or may not work, but here's to hoping that Yaz can bring back my sanity.
